Don’t Kill Me. U2’s New Album Is Lame.

Why does everyone, especially Rolling Stone, feel the need to kiss U2’s ass?

Now, I like U2 (their old stuff), and I really do think that Bono and the band’s dedication to philanthropy is something to be admired, but I’m sorry…I do not like their new album.

Rolling Stone called it “their best album since Achtung Baby.” What? That album was epic. This one is contrived. I feel like this entire new album, titled No Line on the Horizon, is U2 trying to appeal to a younger audience with a new sound. It’s just not U2. I hate when classically good bands try to switch it up. I get that being a musician and an artist means expanding your horizons and being creative, but this new album isn’t even creative. It sounds like a mix between the Jonas Brothers, Aerosmith, and David Bowie (80s Bowie).

The first single “Put On Your Boots,” I don’t get it. This is the most Bowie-sounding track on the album and Bono’s voice sounds forced and pained. Not to mention it’s lacking his range. Bono, we want “Bloody Sunday” style operatics.

While this album isn’t terrible, I still feel like All That You Can’t Leave Behind was better. It was more classically U2 yet still contemporary. I’m just sick of magazines seeing a new album from a big band like U2 and automatically loading up the bandwagon. What happened to being objective? Stop kissing asses and say what you mean.

Rolling Stone gave it 5 stars (meaning “classic”) something not even Led Zeppelin obtained.

I’m interested to see what Paste says about it in their new issue…

EDIT: Paste gave it a 62/100. FINALLY, someone unpuckers their lips and does some objective journalism. Thank you Corey duBrowa!

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