My Life As Liz on MTV is one of my new guilty pleasures. It’s not good. It’s completely staged, yet I love it. I feel like Liz is a lot like I was in high school. She used to be popular but then got sick of faking happy and made friends with people she actually had things in common with, only to have her former “friends” turn on her. I feel her, even if she’s (probably) fictional.
I watch it because it’s always on TV while I’m laying in bed trying to sleep. It’s mindless entertainment–though I can’t help but asking myself one question: If Liz Lee can have a show on MTV, why can’t I?
My life is more entertaining than hers. I rap “Shoop” by Salt N Pepa at karaoke and have a black man tell me I have “flow for a white girl.” She is trying to win a talent show when I already win at karaoke. Liz and her friends LARP with swords while my friends and I recite Shakespeare and belt out Lady Gaga on a downtown Buffalo street corner. We take spontaneous trips to Canada to see the Kings of Leon 1 hour before the show starts. What does Liz do that’s spontaneous and fun?
Liz is looking for love and I’m trying to stay the hell away from it. It’s far more entertaining to see me squash the hopes and dreams of 20-something males than it is for Liz to pine after one guy with a crooked smile and an odd swagger. Liz silently waits for him to take her out of the friend-zone while I stand up guys, string them along and when they finally get mad I make them feel like it’s their fault.
What would you rather see? A 18 year old high school senior wishing this boy would ask her out or a 21 year old seeking revenge on the male gender by playing with their minds as she pretends to let them in but is really keeping them as far away from her as possible.
I’ll take the latter, thanks. It’s far better TV.
So while I admit that I enjoy watching My Life As Liz I still need to beg one question: Where’s MY show MTV?
P.S. Happy February!