"Once you kill a cow, you gotta make a burger."

Lady Gaga’s new video, “Telephone” featuring Beyonce premiered on E News tonight–after it leaked on the Internet of course.

It’s essentially lesbian soft-core prison porn with dancing interludes and haute couture costumes, which left me with only two words in my mouth:

Holy. Crap.
(Watch it HERE)
I’ll admit, I’m not impressed with all the product placement (I’m talking to YOU Virgin Mobile, Polaroid, Wonder Bread, Miracle Whip) BUT it was still AMAZING. And plus, Gaga’s got to get the money to make a nine and a half minute music video where she drives Quentin Tarantino’spussy wagon.” Pussy wagons don’t come cheap!
Lady Gaga really does have an eye for theatrics. She’s visionary and incredible at what she does. Though “Telephone” is my least favorite track off of The Fame Monster (maybe it’s because I’m not a Beyonce fan…even though I do like “Videophone”) but this video totally redeems the song for me.
It’s a continuation of the “Paparazzi” video in which Gaga kills her boyfriend. In “Telephone” Gaga is in jail but is bailed out by Beyonce where they partake in some Thelma and Louise-style debauchery, killing Beyonce’s man and a whole diner-full of people.
It just gets better as it goes on. Gaga looks HOT, dancing in her g-string (she if officially my inspiration to STOP EATING). The choreography was intuitive and the costumes (as always for Gaga) were creative and innovative. I especially liked her American flag get-up in the end dance sequence.
This is the best Gaga has ever looked in a video.
Job well done (AGAIN), Lady Gaga! You’re amazing!

One comment

  1. Meg · March 12, 2010

    dude. this was epic. product placement was a bit silly, but maybe that's where she got all her monies?anywho, GAGA IS GOD. le end.

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