HOT mess

Tila. Look at your life. Look at your choices.

Dear Tila,

Your new “blog” is the most absurd, narcissistic, self-promoting, pompous, self-centered, air-headed thing I have ever read IN. MY. LIFE. “Miss Tila OMG of all media” is horrendous. Seriously. Don’t you hire people to make sure you don’t suck? Like a publicist? If not, you should get one if you’re going to insist on staying in the “spotlight.” Though currently you’re one nipple slip away from social obscurity anyway.

Tila, I know blogs are a form of self expression…and I know that my blog isn’t that special but MY blog doesn’t get millions of hits because people have no idea who I am. YOU are at least somewhat in the spotlight (thanks to MTV and a recently deceased girlfriend) and you should pay attention to that. People are going to read what you write so you might want to make it at least moderately worthwhile.

You could start with learning how to use spellcheck and perhaps a comma or two. You could also try *maybe* being original. Your blog reeks of bootleg Perez. What do you do? Read his posts and then decide to write your own take on his gossip? That’s pretty much plagiarism my dear.

You also may want to stray from being hypocritical. Your post about reality train wreck, Kate Gosselin literally made me, as you so eloquently put it, “LOL.” Yes, Kate is a “famewhore” (which is STILL two words by the way) but so are you little lady. Why does a marginally famous, washed up, reality “star” start a gossip blog? To piss people off, turn heads and get noticed. Why were you so outspoken when your girlfriend died? To get noticed. Why did you put yourself half-naked on MySpace? To get noticed. And why did you transition from My Space to reality T.V. in the first place? TO GET NOTICED. Sounds like you’re a fame whore, too. I guess it really does take one to know one.

Tila. I’m sorry. You’re not a blogger. You should permanently log out of your jacked-up WordPress account and MOVE ON. You made a name for yourself by being slutty and bisexual. Go back to doing what you do best: walking around half-naked and throwing yourself at the nearest piece of genitalia.

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