Aerosmith’s new video for “Legendary Child”

It’s been just about two weeks since I saw Aerosmith live in Albany, NY. Surprisingly, to me anyway, they were pretty great. I thought that after all of the drama in recent years and the total failure of Honkin’ On Bobo that one of my favorite bands might be done for. But honestly, they were just as good, if not better, than they were in 2003 the first time I saw them.

So today, when they released their new music video for their first single “Legendary Child” off their upcoming album Music From Another Dimension I was intrigued. The song is only OK–what would they do with the music video?

The video begins with this weird talking sequence about Aerosmith being the best rock ‘n’ roll band in America (kind of true) and talks of their struggles (all true) and general awesomeness (mostly true) and then morphs into this chick on roller skates running away from people with creepy make-up while the band performs and Steven Tyler dutifully shares his microphone with the rest of the band, like a good boy.

It’s in a word: hilarious.

But I can’t yet decide whether it’s hilarious and over the top on purpose or if the dudes of Aerosmith are really that egomaniacal and awkward. Most of me is leaning towards the latter but let’s not jump to conclusions.

The video hypes up the new album like it’ll be the greatest thing to happen to rock music in 2012 (Sorry boys, Jack White’s Blunderbuss probably already beat you to it). It’s cheesy but also kind of cool. Joe Perry looks sexy as always, Steven Tyler’s mouth is still huge and gaping, and Joey Kramer looks like Guy Fieri‘s dad who just can’t let go of the “good times.” Tom Hamiltion and Brad Whitford? They mostly just stand there looking confused.

And confused they should be because the whole video kind of seems like Steven Tyler got on one of his WHOOO WAH WOW CHICKEN DINNER LAHHHHHWOOO AHHH BANG rants and decided that roller skates were the new stripper pole. I’m betting on this theory because the video opening mentions yetis, the “abominable no-man” and even, “Not yetis.” (WHAT IS GOING ON. I thought they all sobered up?)

I don’t get the video and maybe I’m not supposed to. Maybe it’s just supposed to be fun…that it accomplishes, it is fun. But the video’s opening says the girls on roller skates are doing the story of Aerosmith and I just don’t see it…aside from the ending when said girl on roller skates opens a box, presumably Pandora’s Box (also the name of Aerosmith’s 1991 compilation album). I see what you did there. Part 2 for single 2?

I see the story of the band (or at least the part about sex and drugs) in the song’s lyrics…I just don’t see it in hot girls roller skating. Really, what I wouldn’t give for a day inside Steven Tyler’s brain to figure that out.

Want to know what I’m rambling on about? Watch the video here.

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